Turning Angry Patients Into Opportunities

Andrea (00:04):
Well, hi there. I am Andrea Watkins, and if you're listening to this while juggling three patient calls, checking in a couple patients, taking a payment, selling skincare, and trying to catch your doctor in between procedures, you might be working in an aesthetic practice.

Blake (00:18):
And I'm Blake Lucas and this is Practiceland. This is not your doctor's podcast. Welcome back to Practiceland listeners. It's a stormy day in Practiceland. We're going to be talking about patient pushback, how to deal with anger and frustration. So really excited to get into this because I think we can turn these difficult situations into an amazing opportunities today. We're excited to welcome back Heather Hughes Hardy and Jenna Hennig. So first off, Heather is a former COO and RN who partners with practices to take big ideas and make them work in real life, ultimately drive profitability that lasts. Thank you Heather for being here.

Heather (00:58):
Yeah, thanks for having me back.

Blake (01:00):
Absolutely. And Jenna, of course is a nationally known aesthetic nurse injector and sales strategist who's all about helping providers connect with patients on a deeper level and really just trying to make that process feel a little less salesy.

Jenna (01:13):
Yeah, thanks for having me. I'm super excited.

Blake (01:16):
Awesome. As I mentioned at the top of the episode, we're talking about something that really we all have to deal with and it's an unfortunate experience, but working with people, this is going to happen. The angry customer, there are so many different examples from every single job I've ever had where I had to deal with these types of situations. Recently our team had a really amazing experience that came out of someone that came in really, really hot. So we had a patient, she was a little bit older, did not like technology, and when we are a FinTech company, it's in our DNA that we are technology forward, so this was gonna be, we were going to be butting heads from the very beginning. And so it was tough. She called in and she was extremely frustrated with our process just because it was all online.

(02:11):
She has a flip phone, she was self-confessed hater of technology. And so one of our agents really took the time to take her through the entire process. We were able to bring that human interaction back to it even when we have to use technology. And ultimately at the end of that, it was a long process, but we got through it and she was able to get approved and get the financing that she needed for her treatment and she was so thrilled at the end of it left this amazing glowing review. It's online, you can go find it, but it was probably one of the funniest reviews that I've ever read to because she really gets into it. It was like a dissertation of everything that happened, but she's funny throughout the whole side of it. So it was so rewarding to see that go from such a difficult experience to one where this person is someone who's going to talk about us to other customers. So Heather, what are some of the usual reasons patients get angry in an aesthetic practice that you would say?

Heather (03:10):
Yeah, I feel like it's usually related to scheduling, timing or maybe dissatisfaction with their results. But I remember a patient who came in really hot one day, arms crossed, she had a very sharp tone and was clearly not happy. She had been scheduled for a treatment but wasn't told that the appointment was actually at her secondary location. So she drove across town to the wrong office. She got stuck in traffic and was trying to backtrack and ended up arriving late and she was just completely flustered. She was mad and she was mad because the scheduler wasn't clear. She felt like her time didn't matter. She said that she had done her part and that we dropped the ball. And what I've learned is that most patient anger isn't about the inconvenience itself, it's about what the inconvenience represents to them. It feels like a breakdown in respect, communication or even their care. And so when we respond, it can't just be about rescheduling or making it right logistically, it does have to be about acknowledging the emotion behind it because that's what diffuses the anger and then rebuilds that trust.

Blake (04:18):
Jenna, I'm going to ask you for a personal story too, just because one, I love the drama, so I want to know what maybe from a personal experience that you've had or similar situation with someone coming in hot?

Jenna (04:30):
Yeah, I mean honestly there's many because all that to say that I feel like it all boils down to somebody feeling like they feel valued and appreciated. And so one that comes to mind about the specifically is a patient who came in and we had started her treatment plan. We had started with some skin tightening and I walked into the room and I could already tell she was pissed. Her arms were crossed, she had this angry look on her face. I walked in and I said, good morning, how are you doing today? And she goes, I'm fine. I was like, okay, here we go.

Blake (05:06):
You are not fine.

Jenna (05:06):
I know exactly. And the thing is, the reality is that I do care. I want to make sure that she has a positive experience from this. And so I sat down and I got eye level with her and I said, okay, I can tell that you're frustrated. Tell me what's going on. And I let her give her entire explanation. I did not interrupt her. I think that is the most important thing is people just want to feel heard and understood. So I let her give her entire explanation and then I mirrored back what she had told me and I said, I hear that you're frustrated. I hear that you expected to see results sooner. I understand that this is not where you thought you would be at this point of the treatment plan. And I validated everything. That is a very common frustration that we have with these skin tightening devices is wanting results sooner and you are not wrong for that.

(05:55):
This is something that we discussed and I reminded her back in the initiation of this treatment plan, I told you that best results will be seen at six months and that I could guarantee you a 30% improvement. And we were hoping for more. Let's look at these before and after pictures and just take a look at where we're at so we can kind of get on the same page as far as how much improvement we've seen and what we can expect moving forward. And so I think validating and mirroring back to them is the most important thing when it comes to helping them feel understood. And most of the time when it comes to the results, once you show that before and after, they're like, oh, well I guess there is a change. That's what I hear the majority of time happen. Exactly. Then I walked her through, this is completely normal.

(06:36):
Almost all my patients have these little hiccups along the road where you want to see the results sooner. It's difficult to wait. You're seeing yourself every single day in the mirror and it's hard to see these subtle changes and this is exactly why we take these pictures. I completely understand where you're coming from and just normalized her feelings for her. And that really went a long way. And something that I learned back at a conference that has always stuck with me is a patient who has an issue and has a positive solution ends up happier than a patient who had no issue at all because they had a problem. And either you as the provider can be like, well, too bad, so sad, can't guarantee anything. Or you can say, I hear you, I care about you. Let's form a solution together. And that shows that you care about them and so they end up having a better relationship with you moving forward than somebody who ended up just coming and getting a good result and moving on.

Blake (07:25):
Yeah, I think I mean that's a really, really good point. I think there's so many times where, I dunno, I'm guilty of this. There's times where I take it a little personally and my mindset coming into dealing with that situation is, well, I didn't do anything wrong. Why are you so mad? There's no justification in my mind for why you're so upset with me. And so I almost come into that interaction, very defensive, very combative. I'm trying to prove them wrong or they'll get a one up type of thing and it's so easy to fall into that. So I think it's really important to think about your mindset as you come in. Heather, how do you think about responding to frustrated patients or how should we think about when we're responding to these people?

Heather (08:12):
Yeah, I think it's so normal to feel that way. You build it up in your head, you know it's going to be some type of situation, but it's so important. We want to take a step back and remember that our patient is likely feeling unheard, uncertain or out of control, and you want to be compassionate to that. So when you're responding, you don't want to try to just jump to the fix, you want to slow down, like Jenna said, validate the emotion before you solve the problem. Your goal is really to remain that calm authority and you want to center the professional relationship to diffuse the tension because your job in that moment is not just service recovery, it's a little bit of trust repair, and when you handle it well, you don't just salvage the relationship, but you actually strengthen it just like both of your stories with your customer or your patient. There was a strengthening of that relationship.

Blake (09:03):
Kind of piggyback off what Jenna said too, there is data behind this that says that patients that have an issue that get resolved are twice as likely to refer or recommend you and remain loyal to your practice. And so it makes so much sense, right? You've gone through something difficult together, you've solved it together and now we're moving on. There's now a much stronger bond or loyalty to your practice now that there's probably a level of respect now too. I think again too, the first reaction that people have is tense or is to get upset and it really starts to spiral out of control with apologies. Do you think it's okay to apologize or is there a point where we're over apologizing and that can be bad?

Jenna (09:51):
I think from a provider perspective, you have to be careful because you don't want to apologize and assume responsibility for something that you can't control. So you of course want to validate feelings, you want to normalize feelings and you want to show your understanding, but things that you can apologize for is, I'm really sorry that this isn't happening as quickly as you wanted. I'm sorry that this isn't going the way that you expected it to. It's you and me against the problem and we're going to find a solution together. I'm sorry that things haven't gone the way that you expected, but let's talk about next steps because I too want to get you to the point where you have that lifted rejuvenated appearance, whatever their goals were, and that way you're maintaining that authority, you're maintaining that expertise while still validating their feelings.

Blake (10:40):
It's funny, so many things that you're outlining right here, and it's reminding me of my old customer service training when I was working at Apple retail, I think Apple retail for a long time and still in many ways is probably one of the better retail experiences that they have. One of the things that they did is when they got started and they were building up their training for employees, they wanted to understand what is the best possible retail experience that it was out there. And I believe it was the Ritz Carlton that they went to and they said this is a next level experience and they wanted to get trained on that. One of the things, long story short, one of the things that they took away from that was the three A's, which is acknowledge, align, assure. It's like acknowledging the issue, aligning with them and the empathy portion of it and then assuring them like, Hey, we're going to get through this. We have a solution, or I'm going to maybe, I don't know, have the answer right now, but we will get through this together. And so it's like, okay, let's move on. We can get over the frustrations and now really work to resolve whatever this issue might be. Heather, when you start to first notice tension, what's the first thing that you do?

Heather (11:49):
Yeah, I think old me would immediately start to tense up and be like, oh my gosh, I don't want this to go bad. But after some experience in the space and kind of really working through it, not being a very confrontational person myself, I've learned to drop your tone, slow your speech and level with the patient. Again, calling it out directly, having some type of phrase, something that I like to say is like, Hey, let's slow this down so that I can fully understand. Because it's literally saying, Hey, let's slow our speech and you're helping them to do it subconsciously a little bit, and you're calling attention to the fact that there is tension and you want to address it. So it helps you to kind of shift it from the rising negative energy to a space where the patient actually feels like they're going to be heard. And more often than not by just calling attention to it and allowing them some time to just talk it through with you. You can often deescalate what could have easily ruminated and grown to something much larger in the future. And so I mean, I feel like that's just the most common thing that we're saying over and over here is when you see something, just call it and go through it with the patient. Don't let it turn into something.

Blake (13:01):
I always love talking to you both because always have something like specific, there's always a phrase, there's always some specific action that you can take that they can apply, and I absolutely love that, so thank you for those. What about, Heather, you mentioned not being confrontational. I think sometimes I'm the same way and it's funny, in customer service there's going to be confrontation all of the time. What about if you're in a position of leadership or maybe you just have a colleague that is never going to be great with confrontation. How do you handle that? How do you help them? Or do you even believe that they'll never be able to get to that? Or do you think that people can learn these skills?

Heather (13:45):
Yeah, I definitely think that for most it's coachable. You do have to go through it and there are going to be some times where it's not going to go your way, and that's just kind of trial and error in learning it. I'm rarely a believer in a hard script, but I do think for some people who are just not great at confrontation and they just cannot do it, this is my one exception, so give them the script, allow them to escalate to the appropriate team member. So having them say something like, let me find the best person to help you with this, just one moment because that line is going to protect the team member and the patient's experience. And I'd say too, when you are training someone that needs a little bit of help with this, give them that line to say to patients and then you're going back and forth with them because truly I'm someone that has struggled with it and Jenna and I have worked a lot together doing role playing and going back and forth and it seems silly, but it's so true.

(14:42):
If you take the time to plan it out and see what could happen in your mind's eye first, when the real situation arises, it's so much easier to handle. So the one time I will say hard script is for confrontation, and when you need to escalate, have that phrase and pass it along to the appropriate person, but don't forget to follow up. There is nothing worse than saying, Hey, let me get you to the right person one moment, and then the line goes dead. That is just going to bomb explosion. There's no de-escalation from there.

Blake (15:10):
Yeah, right. Oh my gosh. We've had technical issues sometimes where the phone drops the call and you're like, no.

Heather (15:15):
Cuz you know the patient's on the other side of the line being like, I knew they were going to do that. They weren't going to send me to anybody.

Blake (15:22):
Oh, yeah, there's a lot of four letter words going out when that happens. I also like that you call out the practicing of this. This is not something that you maybe we're naturally good at. And I think in my past, I've done a lot of those roleplay scenarios where you sit down across from someone and you go through a situation and they get escalated and then you got to work through it and try to find those ways of going through those three A's that I talked about before, but going through each one of those and practicing that and making that a part of your routine because that's not a natural thing and you need to have that practice. It's super uncomfortable. It could be dorky, it could be weird or whatever. Most of us feel too cool, don't even want to do that, or I've done this a million times, I can handle it.

(16:11):
But get into those situations, then it makes it more natural to go through that and take the time, like Jenna, you mentioned just listening, like slowing things down, lighting them, get through it, because some people naturally will get frustrated and defensive and then interrupt, which is probably the worst thing you can do when someone's extremely upset with you. So practicing those skills. I love that. Heather, you also talked about escalations. What is a good escalation protocol look like if I'm a leader and I'm trying to create a process for my team to follow, what does that look like?

Heather (16:49):
I think it's really dependent on the practice and how many layers of leadership that they have, because if you're a one provider practice with maybe one or two front desk people and an MA or a career coordinator, it's going to look very different than that five location has an HR department type of setup. So I really think it's very specific to the practice itself, but truly, I think any leader of any area needs to be talking with their team members about getting comfortable in those situations. Anytime you're in customer care, whether it's front office or back office, there are situations that will arise. And so it's just putting the appropriate training in place and getting comfortable. I remember when I was, I think probably eight months pregnant, so very highly hormonal and very emotional. We had a very escalated patient come in, and I had been dealing with her for a few months, and truly, I think she's probably a very kind woman, but my hormonal self at the time was not happy to be interacting.

(17:58):
And she came in and sat down with me and I was still pretty uncomfortable with confrontation at the time, and I know I was smiling, and she looked at me after she was done kind of snapping at me and she was like, why are you smiling? And I just had to say, I apologize, I'm a little uncomfortable right now, and my default is to smile. So my point is that we're all human, and I think if you get yourself in a situation where you're like, I don't know why I just did, but I did, I think it's totally okay to be human and level with someone and be like, Hey, I'm sorry I'm uncomfortable. And that will happen as you're practicing too. So just leveling.

Blake (18:37):
No, it's so funny because I've been in situations like that and I've seen colleagues do the same thing where they're working with someone that's really upset and maybe the person's starting to raise their voice and you can tell that they're upset. And the first time I heard it, I literally was like, you can do that? They called them out on it and they said, I don't know why you're so upset with me. This is the program, I remember they were training 'em something on the computer and they were getting upset and frustrated cuz they don't like technology, and so they were like, I'm not sure why you're upset with me. I'm just trying to explain how this works and I'm trying to help you. And it was immediately the person, that human interaction for a moment brought them back and you could tell they're a nice person.

(19:23):
People genuinely want to be nice or kind to each other, and they're like, I'm so sorry. I lost my cool there and I shouldn't have taken that out on you. And I saw that happen live and literally my jaw was on the floor. I was like, yeah, you could just do that. Oh my God, I'm always trying to be so nice and apologetic or whatever, and I was like, no. You can sometimes tell 'em, Hey, this isn't who you want to be. Almost like putting a mirror on 'em a little bit. So fascinating. Fascinating. As we get to the end of this, of course, we want to have some action items to give our listeners what are, maybe Jenna, start with us or start, what's the one thing you'd want us to take away?

Jenna (20:04):
The biggest thing is remembering that most of the time it's not truly about you when the patient is upset, so maintaining your calm, because as soon as you get escalated, that's when things really go the wrong way. So maintaining your calm, validating and uncovering what the true issue is, because usually it's not exactly what is initially presented.

Blake (20:29):
Great. And Heather, how about you?

Jenna (20:30):
Yeah, I'll piggyback off of that. Calm is contagious. The more you model it and hard moments, the better you get at it, the more your team and your patients will follow your lead.

Blake (20:43):
Awesome. Well, Heather, Jenna, thank you again so much for being us. Got a question you want Jenna or Heather to answer? Send us a message at practicelandpodcast.com. Thank you listeners again for joining us in Practiceland. Hopefully you can take a little bit of what we talked about today and apply it to your next difficult customer patient. Have a great day and thank you again for listening. Got a wild customer service story or a sticky patient situation? Send us a message or voicemail. If your tale makes it into our "She did what?" segment, we'll send a thank you gift you'll actually love. Promise, no cheap swag here.

Andrea (21:20):
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